Friday, June 29, 2007

A Junior Update/Weapon of Choice

Just realised how long its been since i blogged about ijebuman jr, he is now 11 months old (amazing how time flies)

Just like Gordon Brown's cabinet reshuffle, we did a furniture reshuffle at ijebuman's mansion this week ; - )
With junior crawling around we've suddenly realised how child unfriendly the place is. The little rascal has developed an unhealthy relationship with everything apart from his toys. He has started chewing on wires, knocking over plants and generally messing up the feng shui arrangement of the place (we ijebu's too get our own feng shui LOL).
No wonder my sister in law was laughing at us last year when we were renovating the house.
Weapon of Choice

London is gradually turning into some knife crazed city, with kids running around stabbing each other. Since the beginning of the year over a dozen teenagers have been fatally stabbed.

According to The Times
Worried parents are buying body armour for their children in an attempt to keep them safe from street violence.
A firm that supplies stab- and bullet-proof vests to government agencies around the world has sold 60 jackets to concerned parents after several murders of teenagers on London streets.
“They are concerned by what is happening on the streets — the level of violence. A 13-year-old girl has been our youngest customer but most are about 15 or 16. Most of the calls have been from London" a spokesman for the firm is reported as saying.

check out the stats
10% of boys aged 11 and 12 are reported to have carried a knife or other weapon and 8% said they had attacked someone intending serious harm. By the age of 16, the figure had risen to 24% who have carried a knife and 16% who had attacked somebody intending harm.

Boy stabbed to death because he looked at youth ‘the wrong way’

Teenager stabbed in third fatal attack since weekend

Call for security checks as one in four pupils admits to being armed

If things carry on this way Jr might end up in a boarding school in good ole Naija.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Hanging on to his L Plates

Yar'Adua still hanging on to his L plates
Sorry i haven't posted in a while, just like our new presido Yar'Adua, i've been taking a well deserved break. Talking about Yar'Adua, i have to agree with Aba boy, the man deserves his nickname "Alhaji go slow".

Someone should wake him up, its like 24 days already or does the man think he was "selected" to sleep and eat 'fura de nunu' in Aso rock.
I've been hearing the usual excuses "he is taking his time" or "he is not rushing into things". Please stop!! My peeps we have to stop making tired excuses, Yar'Adua did not become president on May 29, he became president the minute Obj decided he should become PDP's presidential candidate. So he has had all that time to prepare, the handover on May 29 was a mere formality.

Project naija needs a hands-on 'project manager' that will hit the ground running not some guy 'taking his time'. At this rate, his term will be over by the time he gets round to actually implementing any policy.

Meanwhile, while i was on my Yar'Adua break, Andy Uba was removed from office by the Supreme court. I have to commend whoever updated his wikipedia entry , it was updated almost immediately after the judgement was announced. His website - is now conveniently "offline" : - )

here's a funny one off oyibosonline
Things You'd Wish To Hear While In Nigeria...

here are a few of the best ones:

"It's totally my fault, no one else was involved, I take full responsibility"

"Welcome to our country" (without the usual 'waitin you bring come for us')

"Have a nice trip sir,, no, you don't have to dash me, I'm just doing my job..."

"Ok thank you sir, here's ur driving license and registration papers back, all seems in order, you may leave"

"Yes sir, I have credit on my phone"

"No thank you sir/madam. Please do not give me money. I am just doing my job"

"Apologies for being a little early for our meeting. Don't worry, I'll wait in reception"

"No, I do not mind forming a queue as I came here after you..."

"Sorry did not mean to flash you, of course we can talk using my credit"

"Don't worry, we can get u to any of the nearest hospitals and they'll be able to fix u up"

"We are going to have a party/night vigil tonight. We might be a bit noisy but dont worry, we will close before midnight."

"He is ON seat!"

"On today's financial news, the Naira is now 1 to 1 with the British pound"

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Recommended reading

Recommended reading; Online and Offline

From the man who ''almost killed''
Patrice Lumumba
I've just finished reading 'Chief of station, Congo' by ex CIA agent, Larry Delvin. Delvin was the head of the CIA station in the Congo in the sixties. His book recounts the events at the time of Congo's independence from Belgium, the death of Patrice Lumumba (Congo's first prime minister) and the emergence of Mobutu (who ruled the country for over 30 years).
Delvin attempts to justify America's 'intervention' in the Congo by claiming Lumumba was under the influence of the soviet union and claims America had to use all 'means at its disposal to block all attempts by the USSR to infiltrate, subvert, influence and dominate key areas of Africa.'
Even though he claims the CIA had nothing to do with Lumumba's death, he was ordered by Washington to find a way of getting rid of Lumumba.

He did a bad job convincing me the CIA had nothing to do with Lumumba's death, in fact it left me with the vague feeling that the CIA had a lot to do with all the upheavals happening all over the continent.

Another OFN from OBJ.
Back in the 70s when Obj launched OFN (Operation Feed the Nation), Nigerians nicknamed the scheme Obasanjo Fools the Nation.
Fastforward some twenty something years later and it seems Obj has done another OFN, this time Obasanjo has Fleeced the Nation.
From the news:
The Amazing Wealth Of OBJ
He had a bank balance of N20,000 in 1999. But after eight years as Nigeria’s President, Chief Olusegun Obasanjo will literally spend his retirement sitting on a mint, courtesy of some hugely controversial investments and land acquisitions.

The scots employ the Mail to do the dirty on naija ; - )
From the sunday Mail:
The hidden truth behind Nigeria's £250M fight for Commonwealth Games
Nigeria's sports minister Bala Kaole reckons their bid is "in the bag".He even believes he has convinced the judging team Abuja is safer and more prosperous than Glasgow.
But airbrushed out of their glossy and colourful campaign is the plight of thousands of ordinary Africans made homeless and left poverty-stricken by the Nigerian government's obession with making Abuja the jewel in the crown.

When oil fuels a nightmare instead of a dream
Time Magazine:
Africa's Oil Dreams
Angola, Nigeria and Gabon. The oil industries in each are at markedly different stages. Angola's is in its first explosive flush of production, with gdp expected to grow 27% this year. Nigeria is in its prime, ranking as the world's 12th largest producer in 2006. Gabon's wells are slowly drying up. Together, these three nations trace an evolving arc of oil's effect on Africa and the world, of both its promise and its perils.

Finally.. An Oldie but a goodie ; - )

This is a country where anything can happen
'How to be a Nigerian' was written by Peter Enahoro in 1966, since then a lot has changed but much of what he said in the book still applies today.

Reuben Abati's 2003 article, 'How To Be A Nigerian', can be described as an updated version of the book.

"To remain sane as a Nigerian, you must be religious. And you must advertise your piety. Sleep in the church. Proclaim your religiousity from the rooftops. Mention God's name in every conversation. In a land where there is so much madness, religion offers you the only opportunity to cling on to a measure of holiness. It is the only way to remind yourself that you are human after all, and that there is something that you still believe in."

"If you are unable to cope, perhaps you may consider the option of exile. There are many Nigerians abroad eking out a living as economic refugees. Unable to cope with the many disasters of life in the country of their birth, they have fled to other countries where there is less stress and shock. To be a Nigerian, you must ordinarily learn to live with shock. This is a country where anything can happen."
The full Article

Thursday, June 07, 2007

The Prisoner of Aso rock

Obj may have left Aso rock but he definitely left his 'agbada' behind. Apart from ensuring he remained the head of his party, he has ensured that his favoured candidates and allies were elected as president of the senate and as speaker of the house of representatives.
He obviously needs his allies to keep an eye on the new government. Who knows, Yar'Adua may develop delusions of grandeur and conveniently forget how he got to power.

In Naija, it's hard to trust a man in power, the powerbrokers that helped Obj in 1999 found that out not too long after he moved in to Aso rock. So i suppose Obj is ensuring he has all bases covered.
Yar'Adua may argue that he has a mind of his own and he is not a puppet, but in reality he is a prisoner. A prisoner to the forces that got him into power.
The signs are already there: exhibit A - Ahmadu Ali Dares FCDA
Dr. Ahmadu Ali [PDP chairman] yesterday dared the Federal Capital Development Authority (FCDA) by starting the reconstruction of one of the houses, demolished by the Development Control department of the FCDA.[snip]

Vanguard gathered that the [demolition] exercise had to stop following an instruction from above as it may not augur well for the new administration of Yar'adua to begin with an unpopular agenda of demolition especially that of the Chairman of a party that made it smooth for him to win the primaries amidst the array of aspirants under the platform of PDP for the number one position of the land.

Coming slightly later than expected : - )
Heres the second part of A Post sElection Analysis
A Post sElection Analysis 2

David Mark is new senate president
Who said lying and stealing doesn't get you anywhere, it certainly gets you far in naija, to the number 3 position if you play your cards right.

What to expect:
Well he won't be needing that 6 million pounds frozen in his accounts ; - )

What NOT to expect:
Any debate on how a public officer ended up with 6 million pounds in his personal account

Patricia Foluke Etteh is new Speaker of the house of representatives
I have to be very careful here as she is wifey's aunty ; - ), but the fact remains that she only got the job because she is "extremely" close to Obasanjo and supported his third term agenda.

What to expect:
Will ensure Obasanjo's interests are well protected

What NOT to expect:

ijebuman sending a congratulatory message : - )

Akala, Orji and Uba

Christopher Alao-Akala is the "new" Governor of Oyo state. This is his second reincarnation as governor of Adedibu Kingdom. His first attempt ended when his impeached boss was returned to power by the supreme court.
Akala has shown to his master, by prostrating flat on the ground after he was sworn in as governor, that he will be an obedient servant, but not to the people of Oyo state.
What to expect:
More rolling around and prostration to his political godfather - Lamidi Adedibu

What NOT to expect:
A crisis free Oyo state

T.A Orji is the new Governor of Abia state.

He was 'elected' while in detention, sworn in before may 29 while out on bail and now there are half naked pictures of him at a shrine all over the web (could be fake but who knows).
The whole situation is like a badly acted Nollywood movie

What to expect:
Many more trips to 'Okija shrine' when things turn sour with his political masters

What NOT to expect:
Any investigation into Abia state's finances under Kalu

Andy Uba is the new Governor of Anambra state

Uba was Obj's Senior Special Assistant on Domestic Affairs, brother of Chris Uba (the notorious political godfather of Anambra state) and a regular feature on saharareporters (which uncovered his involvement in money smuggling)

Read more about Uba on his wikipedia entry -
And his reponse to the 'money laundering allegations' -

What to expect:
All lies and no action

What NOT to expect:
A scandal/corruption free tenure