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ijebuman's diary

The online raves and rants of an Ijebu man in London
 
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Thursday, June 15, 2006

he's having a baby 























My life is about to change (big time!!!) yep its going to be scary and exciting at the same time and my life is never going to be the same again.
I'm going to be a father sometime in july (or whenever the little sprog decides to show up). As the day gradually approaches the panic is becoming apparent.

Mrs Ijebuman seems to be coping fine despite the fact that she'll be doing most of the work, while yours truly still can't believe that in a couple of weeks i will be a dad.
I've been reading a book called 'he's having a baby' by Jack O'Sullivan and it has gone a long way in allaying my fears about how totally unprepared i am to face fatherhood.

But many questions still linger, will i bond with this baby? will i be a good father or be a typical naija dad who is only interested in the child's education and nothing else..

and then the financial costs oh dear...

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posted by ijebuman  # 6:20 pm
Comments:
Dear Ijebuman...

Firsty let me congratulate you on the impedng birth of your wonderful joy!!!
Do not worry about being a parent. As a relative first time parent (my son is 3yrs next month), my best advice to you is to always enjoy your child. Revell in the joy and happiness. Don't ask too many people too many questions there are no right or wrong answers, when it comes to childred or babaies every child is Individually DIFFERENT!!!
Secondly, try not to bring any fear or issues from you upbringing or realtionship with your parents into your new relationship. Be guided by your love and the gudance and needs of your baby. If you feel the need to bore others with cute stories of you new found best friend, then go -ahead and do so! If they don't like it, don't get upset! Just speak to them again some other time. Be focused in your duties as a father without obseesing about the protection of your child. Throw away all books about parenting as they only add to fears they NEVER erase them. The most important book (depending on the borough) is the new parents guide that's given to new mothers by the NHS. The reason i say its important is because all it does is give answers to worrrying questions, it does not seek to tell you how to raise your child.

Now as for your other duties:
DO NOT IGNORE Mrs Ijebuman!!! BE there for as when she requirs and sometimes even before she asks! Give her as much time off as you can (bread and buter commitments allowing). If she worries about anything then just listen and ask her what she would like you to do to ally her fears or worries. Do your part in the night feeds and the night baths.

With the wisdom of Solomon and the patience of Job; YOU WILL BE A GREAT DAD!!! Good luck and best wishes.

PS, sny chance of a pic when he/she is arrives?
 
Thanks so much for your comments. Son't worry there's definitely going to be pictures when the baby arrives
 
Congratulations in advance!! well, never having been a parent before, can't say I have any advice to give you. But I think the fact that you're already worried about bonding with your baby etc shows that you already care about him/her, so bonding with or loving it shouldn't be a problem and will probably come naturally. Wish you all the joy in the world!!
 
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